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filipsperl    349

Here's the first chapter of my holy potato cup bible, if you haven't read it already ;)

*clears throat*

Once upon a time, there was a young boy. He loved adventures, games and potatoes. He's name was Seth, Seth the R. He used to spend all his time in the wilderness, chasing rabbits, building sheds, killing ants and farming potatoes. He always felt the strenght of the forest, the trees, the animals and the potatoes within him, when he entered his kingdom. His mom wasn't that happy about the whole forest thing and always made sure he had plenty of food in his treehouse, even though Seth didn't want her to enter his castle in the heights of the majestic trees. He always wanted to make some friends, but besides the squirrels, there wasn't anyone to play with. Later he got bored and bought the newest Game Boy. But, that was a big mistake, as he started to escape the forest with his mind. He wasn't one with nature anymore. And the nature got pissed! It started to rain. And it started to rain heavier. And heavier! Because poor Seth became a game developer, he forgot the way home. When his Game Boy ran out of battery, he began to consume all the Doritoes his mum gave him. But what he didn't had, in order to survive, was some water to drink. Luckily, it was still raining and Seth thought for a while he's too OP for the nature. However, he soon realised, he had nothing to collect the water with. He ate the rest of the Doritoes and started to count how many potatoes he had, just like in the movie Martian. And so, the young boy was eating the potatoes for the next five days, while it was still raining. Having to catch the water from rain in his mouth was pretty exhausting and he was becoming more and more thirsty every day spent in the wilderness. When it looked like he had no chance of surviving on the sixth day, he was, with the fear of the death in his eyes, eating his last potato. He was carving it like a pumpkin, putting the insides of it on the wood plate he made yesterday, just to make his last meal a bit special, when suddenly, a lightning stoke the roof of his treehouse, making a small hole in it. Seth covered his eyes, but there wasn't any water drops falling on his face. He slowly realised all the water was collecting in the carved potato. It was almost full already. Seth rushed to the cup and took a big sip of fresh water. He felt the energy going through his veins again. He drank the whole cup and started laughing. The nature saved him. The potato saved him. THE HOLY POTATO CUP! He swore to his Game Boy's battery, that he will become a successful video game developer, making survival games with rain, teaching everyone how to survive such a harsh weather anomaly. He swore the he will spread the great knowledge about the holy potato cup on a livestream. A while after that, the rain stopped. Seth the R, the Great Potato Cup Inventor, went home. He grew older and started making homeworks and fulfilling his duty...

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AnonymousKoala    3637
4 minutes ago, 9screamingkittens said:

y'all if you keep arguing about shipping ill declare all ships forbidden but pig king x spider queen to suit ur needs

Pig King X Spider Queen? Mommy Longlegs want nothin' to do with king of the bullies!

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