roboman's don't starve stories

[roboman101]

this is a story of Wilson and his friends: willow, Wendy, wickerbottom, Wolfgang, Wx-78, and Wes, it’s kind of how they reacted to the updates, starting with the insanity update a few things you need to know, Wilson calls Wx-78 "wix" for short, even though Wx-78 hates being called that, Maxwell has an assistant called "Spidey" a spider warrior who is loyal to Maxwell and Grue only. And there is a guardian of the island called Wendman, who adds things to help Wilson survive Maxwell’s deadly "upgrades" to the island, such as the ice box, the crock pot, the umbrella, and the taffy. Also Wilson has invented a special type of watch that looks like the meters on the right side of the screen that displays the wearer’s health, hunger, sanity, and the point of day

the insanity update

at Maxwell’s place, Maxwell was trying to think of how he could kill Wilson without Wendman getting in the way, then, Grue had a grin on his face "I just remembered!" he said "I have some friends of mine that are not as dark as me, but they’ll get the job done, "bring them in" said Maxwell, Grue then made an odd howl, just as horrible, but not as blood curdling as his usual. Instantly, several dark creatures came, one, a tick-like creature, another, a tall, slender creature, with four small legs and a giant beak, others, a serpent-like shadow, a tall, tree looking thing, a hand, and eyes that appeared in Grue's darkness "their called hallucinations" said Grue "this is terrorbeak, crawling horror, night hand, night watcher, Mr. skitts, and eyes" "interesting," said Maxwell "can any of you do any harm?" only terror beak, night hand, and crawling horror responded, "very well, at least you others can make Wilson crazy, for this addition is going to drive them mad"

Wilson has experienced odd behavior ever since Maxwell’s addition, he was becoming more and more crazy and scared, all he hoped was that Wendman can give them something to help him, however, they don’t know if he has, and Wilson’s to the point where he's cowering in the tent, scared and won’t come out, willow and the others know that he's in there but none of them know how to get him out, all they can do is wait, until, one day Wilson saw a glowing portal in front of him that shot something into his mouth, it tasted sweet and chewy like gum , and he felt less scared and more sane, although it gave him a toothache, just then, something else launched into Wilson’s mouth, only this one was more flat and tasty, like a cookie, and it tasted like pumpkin, this time it didn’t hurt him, Wilson submerged from the tent modest and proud, “Wilson!” said willow “finally got over that fear?” “yes I have” said Wilson “and it’s all thanks to Wendman and these” Wilson held up the taffy and pumpkin cookie, everyone stared at it “apparently, Maxwell did something and now we can go insane, and these can help us stay sane” “but how can we go insane?” asked Wolfgang, wickerbottom submerged from her tent wearing a top hat and dapper vest “from what I have observed we can go insane by doing anything or being around anything ‘scary’ wearing anything that will keep us calm and relaxed can slow that process down” she said. Everybody was looking at Wilson, who was looking into the darkness around their camp curiously “Wilson, I see you have finally found that there is nothing but emptiness, soullessness, void in the dark,” said Wendy “same goes for my soul” “Wendy, enough with the creepy sayings” said Wilson “and it’s not that, there’s eyes looking at us” “there’s nothing there” said Wx-78 “you humans are getting more and more insane”. Wilson looked at his watch, the night is still new, so he decided to check it out, he grabbed a torch and headed out into the darkness, all around him there where eyes, looking at him, each with different expressions, and they disappeared when he went up to them, Wilson thought this was useless, then he saw a faint glow, much like a campfire about to go out , but by the time he got there, it burned out, the only weird thing was, how did it get there and what was on his back? He felt as if there was something trembling on him, almost vibrating, and he could hear a faint teeth chattering “is someone there?” he asked, no answer he looked at his watch, it was almost day, and his torch was running out, by the time he got back to camp day came “hey guys do you know what’s on my back?” he asked “it is just a foolish human” Wilson took off his back pack and for a second he could see something, only it instantly jumped onto Wilson’s back again “allow me” said wickerbottom, holding a pumpkin cookie “here, you seem insane, eat this there is more in that bag if you need-“ whoever it was, he instantly grabbed the cookie, ate it, and ate the rest as if he has never eaten before in his life, finally, he was calm, he seemed like a mime, “hi, my name Wilson, who are you?” the man just did a few hand signals “if you’re going to be with us don’t be playful this is not charades” said Willow “he’s obviously saying his name is Wes, he can’t talk, and he’s not good at doing anything” said Wx-78 “you can understand that?” said Wolfgang “I used to meet up with robots who couldn’t talk” “well Wes, it looks like you’re the newest member of the group,” said Wilson “but with our help, we can make you have some use.” Wes looked happy, but then he looked terrified and pointed to some random direction “what are you pointing at weakling?” said Wolfgang. Right then Maxwell appeared, furious, “UNBELEVABLE!” he said “HOW IS IT THAT YOU HAVE MADE WES SURVIVE?” “ guess we’re just that good” said willow “face it Maxwell” said Wilson “we’re becoming better than your traps” “the time is growing nearer for me to stab this night sword through you” said Wendy, holding a dark sword, everybody stared at it, surprised, even Maxwell “Wendy,” said Wilson “where’d you get that?” “Wes killed a rabbit and he gave me this” she held up nightmare fuel “then I put some on a stick and it tuned into this, same goes for this when I put some on papyrus” she held up night armor “what is that insect near you?” “how rude of me to forget” said Maxwell pulling out a black flame “allow me to introduce you to a friend of Grue,” Maxwell then held the flame up to Wilson “the crawling horror” Wilson then saw a tick like creature standing next to Maxwell “nice try, I know I’m insane,” said Wilson therefor, that’s just my imagination, it can’t hurt me” “oh really?” the crawling horror scratched Wilson in the arm “ouch, how, how, how is that possible?” “they are only visible when someone’s insane” said Maxwell “see you later and hopefully never” Maxwell disappeared, “this may be challenging, but now that we know what we’re up against, we can prepare, there will be no stopping us, from defeating Maxwell!”

[roboman101]

the winter update

it has gotten surprisingly cold outside, very cold in fact, Wilson and the others thought it was just Maxwell, joking with them. they decided to rethink their thoughts by the time every single one of them caught a cold, except for willow and WX-78. "this is, *sniff* odd" said Wilson "is Maxwell trying to get us sick or something? *snuff*" "HA HA" mocked WX "look how worthless you are, I cannot get sick, therefore I am better than any human HA HA" "may I remind you that I'm not sick either" said willow "then it would be best if the two of you head outside and see what else has been brought while I give the rest of us some food that will cure us of our illness *sniff, sneeze*" said wickerbottom "she's right,*sneeze* wix, you and willow need to see what else Maxwell has brought to try and kill us" "why don't i go?" said Wolfgang "I am too mighty to get sick" Wolfgang then sneezed so hard it almost brought down the tent they where in "fine" said WX "but only because I don't want to be covered in snot by captain bazooka sneeze over there, and stop calling me wix!" "come on" said willow. after they left, wes made a sneezing-like motion "wow*snuff* even his sneeze is silent" said Wilson. meanwhile, at WX and willow, they where trying to make it through the snow when WX stumbled upon something "what is it?" he said holding up a blue gem "it looks like a red gem, but blue" WX thought and as a pointless joke he put it onto a spear and began swinging it around "look at me, im the ice wizard," he said "BOOM, BOOM, BOOM, BOO-!" something came out of it and hit willow, instantly she was covered in ice, "i should keep this" WX said shortly after willow froze, which instantly was melting. willow gave WX an annoyed look, WX was instantly trying to change the subject" um, uh, um ehh, YOWCH!" both of them looked to see a blue hound, chomping on WX's robot bottom and there where two walruses and another hound not far away "look at what our two hounds caught us today a female and a male man" said the larger one "Im an automaton, not a mailman" "father, that man's made of metal" said the younger walrus "does that walrus know he's wearing a skirt?" said WX "I'll have you know metal man" "automaton" "whatever, this is not what you call a 'skirt' this is a kilt" "which is also a skirt" said willow. both walruses where angry "oh, you're head'll look nice on my wall" "ya we're not your enemies tuskman" "it's mac'tusk to you" "I don't care, but could you please tell your dog to let go of my butt?" "I don't think so, you see we are good friends of Maxwell and we got orders from him to kill you and your friends" said mac'tusk "I thought grue and spidey where his only friends" showing grue, spidey and Maxwell watching what was going on spidey looked at Maxwell eagerly, "you're not" said Maxwell. spidey returned to what he was doing. "sick em'" said mac'tusk "RUN!" said willow, both willow and WX ran for their lives, they managed to lose the hounds in a forest, unfortunately, they managed to lose their direction too and they don't know there they are. "whats going on?" said willow "what?" said WX "I feel wierd, my inside is clumped up and trembling, my bones feel fragile and its making me shake" "its called 'cold,' genius, although now that you mentioned it, my gears are starting to freeze up, lets just keep going". after a long time of walking and running, they finally found the camp "yikes what happened to you two," said Wilson "you both look like you've been mauled by hounds, wix you can barely move and willow your almost as pale as Wendy" "don't call me wi- ah forget it I'm too weak to care". being next to the fire Wilson handed each of them black sweaters, here, where this, it should keep you from freezing. "its itchy, whats this thing made of?" said willow "you might not want to know" Wilson then grew part of his beard, which he then shaved off "Wolfgang, I got some more material" "EW, GROSS,!"said WX, throwing the beard sweater on the ground and stomping on it, "hey would you rather die, or stay warm" "die if it means being covered in beard hair" "whatever, so willow what did you find?" "well, WX made this ice staff which freezes anything" willow gave Wilson the staff" and there's some sort of walrus in a skirt hunting us" "I think you're referring to a kilt" said wickerbottom "that's what he said" said WX "he's also got two blue hounds that crave my butt" "as funny as that is," said Wilson "we need to find out more." right then there was a glow of light "winter has arrived," a voice said "Wendman!"said Wilson "you must prepare yourselves for a great battle" said Wendman "what battle?" "I cant wait to see a spear pierce its heart" said Wendy "it is the battle of the deerclops" Wendman disappeared "we must prepare with all we can" said Wilson "if Maxwell thinks he can kill us, he's wrong"

[roboman101]

after the rain update (which i couldn't come up with a story reaction for it) i saw about the shadow manipulator, also I loved how WX calls the science machine and alchemy engine "mother" because the shadow manipulator can unlock everything the science machine and alchemy engine can so, and i really wanted to post this.Wilson walks up to the science machine and alchemy engine and wonders "you know now that we have the shadow manipulator, we don't need these to anymore" Wilson got out his hammer and began hammering away at the two machines "there" he said "now we can use the resources for something else" Wilson then turned to see WX staring at him, wide-eyed and jaw-dropped "hey wix whats up?" moments later, WX is now chasing Wilson"WILSON I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!""what did I do? what did I do?"

Edited March 23, 2013 by roboman101

[kilozombie2]

...UmYou can tell stories well?Like, you can get the plot across... moderately normally?It's bland as all hell though...There is an enter key, by the way.It makes you go down a line.Likethis.It'ssopeoplecanactually read what you're writing, I mean /oh god/.

[Lordfiscus]

*appears on kilo's ceiling* I probably shouldn't be here... I was never on the ceiling!*disappears*

[roboman101]

...UmYou can tell stories well?Like, you can get the plot across... moderately normally?It's bland as all hell though...There is an enter key, by the way.It makes you go down a line.Likethis.It'ssopeoplecanactually read what you're writing, I mean /oh god/.

well if you dont enjoy this one then you might like maxwell's journal and i know about the enter key, how do you think that I put WX yelling at wilson. and I was trying to be funny, if you don't like my humor then look at my brother's once he gets an account.

[kilozombie2]

I wasn't insulting you, it's called constructive criticism. I didn't like your writing, and tried to tell you why and how you could improve.Please don't cast me off because I "didn't enjoy this one". I didn't, and I want to explain that. Take it as you will, but I'd appreciate if you don't get defensive about it.

[roboman101]

I wasn't insulting you, it's called constructive criticism. I didn't like your writing, and tried to tell you why and how you could improve.Please don't cast me off because I "didn't enjoy this one". I didn't, and I want to explain that. Take it as you will, but I'd appreciate if you don't get defensive about it.

I'm not who said I was all I was saying was if you didn't like this there's another that you could enjoy and I do agree my humor does need some work.