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Jakob nods silently to Ayasha, then turns back to the old man.

 

"It is good to see you again as well, but we really, really don't have time for introductions.  We need to get to the Beacon Towers, and quickly."

 

Azcar thinks for a few moments.

 

"My men and I will keep them off you as much as possible.  I only have twenty Warriors at my side, but each has prove - "

 

"Yeah that's great."  Jakob cuts him off.  "We need to go.  Gather your troops and do what you need to do."

Jakob lists the things off on his fingers as he speaks.

 

"First, we have to fight off an army of shades."  He says, raising a finger.  "Then, stop a brainwashed maniac from destroying our only way to Shadowfall."  He lifts another.  "Then, we kill the aforementioned Shadowfall..." Another finger.  "...Ooooorrrrrr we're too late and he kills everyone."

 

He looks at his fingers.

 

"So yeah, that's four things."

(YOU'RE NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH TO KEEP OUR ATTENTION!)

 

(Here, i got an idea.)

 

Suddenly, just as everyone is about to fight, an earthquake, volcano, car crash, nuclear explosion, meteorite landing, aliens, 17 dragons, the Great Depression, hamster assault, flood, drought, war between Heaven and Hell, awakening of Cthulhu, Combine invasion, Half Life 3, Portal 3, L4D 3, Don't Starve Movie, Multiplayer, Cows & Cows & Cows, Black Death, Apocalypse, and an Epic Choir happen all at once.

 

(Fine, let me explain.

 

Earthquakes, volcanos, car crashes, and periodically, nuclear explosions are quite common. Meteorites hit the Earth plenty of times. No evidence for aliens and dragons. Great Depression was a good time for me to attack people. I hit my pet hamster with a shovel, so what will stop me from attacking everyone else? Floods are caused by earthquakes, and as I said before, they are common. Droughts happen all the time. Heaven is actually three times hotter than Hell, based on stuff in the bible, so angels up there would've died. I don't give a crap about Cthulu or Invasions. Never played Half Life. Don't play Portal much. Hate shooting games. We all know movies based on video games suck. Multiplayer is already a thing in a game called Real Life. I like that video. Black death is nothing. Apocalypse gives me a cover to kill. Don't know what that is.)

"So, I guess it's time. Let's go do this."

"It's time for him to pay back Snowfall's life in full."

Will activates his Rainblower, and Dark Will loads his revolver.

"Hey, um... Will? Do you have that thunder sword?"

"Yeah, why? Oh wait, you are the one who can control lightning, right? Yeah, you could probably use that more than me."

Will fishes the lightning sword out of his back, and hands it to Violet.

"Now, let's go kick some ass."

 

(Note, this conversation is occurring during the running.)

Edited by Will

(Let me try something.)

 

Celina watches the chaos from afar, watching everyone meet their demises in the field of glory, watching the gore happening as if it was a pleasant cartoon. The screaming, the shrieks of the fallen, it was pleasant music to her ears, riling her up like a bulldog, and all at once, she charged onto the battlefield, waving her osteotome madly; it didn't matter if she hit a friend or a foe, as long as there was blood.

 

(How's this? That's all I can really do.)

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