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Who would be the first one to fall off of Rainbow Road

Primalflower

By Primalflower,
in The Off-Topic Area

WHO WHO WHO   

19 members have voted

  1. 1. but hoooow?

    • Wilson
      5
    • Wilson Short Beard
      0
    • Wilson Long Beard
      0
    • Wilson Magnificent Beard
      1
    • Willow
      1
    • Willow [No Bernie] [Full Sanity]
      0
    • Willow [Bernie] [Full Sanity]
      0
    • Willow [Bernie] [Low Sanity]
      1
    • Willow [Bernie] [No Sanity]
      2
    • Wolfgang [Wimpy]
      2
    • Wolfgang [he ok]
      0
    • Wolfgang [Mighty]
      2
    • Wendy [No Abigail]
      0
    • Wendy [Level 1 Abigail]
      0
    • Wendy [Level 2 Abigail]
      0
    • Wendy [Level 3 Abigail]
      1
    • WX-78 0 gears no overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 0 gears overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 1 gear no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 1 gear overcharge
      2

  2. 2. 2: Its About Time

    • WX-78 2 gears no overcharge
      4
    • WX-78 2 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 3 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 3 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 4 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 4 gears overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 5 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 5 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 6 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 6 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 7 gears no overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 7 gears overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 8 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 8 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 9 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 9 gears overcharge
      3
    • WX-78 10 gears no overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 10 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 11 gears no overcharge
      2
    • WX-78 11 gears overcharge
      6

  3. 3. 3: WARPED!

    • WX-78 12 gears no overcharge
      1
    • WX-78 12 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 13 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 13 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 14 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 14 gears overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 15 gears no overcharge
      0
    • WX-78 15 gears overcharge
      3
    • Wickerbottom [no books]
      0
    • Wickerbottom [Birds of the World]
      1
    • Wickerbottom [Applied Horticulture]
      0
    • Wickerbottom [Sleepytime Stories]
      0
    • Wickerbottom [On Tentacles]
      1
    • Wickerbottom [The End is Nigh]
      3
    • Woodie [No Idols]
      0
    • Woodie [Beaver Idol]
      0
    • Woodie [Moose Idol]
      1
    • Woodie [Goose Idol]
      4
    • Wes [No Balloonomancy]
      4
    • Wes [Balloon Mech]
      1

  4. 4. 4: Wrath of Cortex

    • Maxwell [No Umbra]
      3
    • Maxwell [Duelist]
      2
    • Maxwell [Logger]
      1
    • Maxwell [Miner]
      0
    • Maxwell [Hacker]
      2
    • Wagstaff [No Goggles]
      2
    • Wagstaff [Spectoggles]
      0
    • Wagstaff [Infroggles]
      0
    • Wagstaff [Goomboggles]
      1
    • Wagstaff [Visor]
      0
    • Wagstaff [Fryfocals]
      1
    • Wagstaff [Dieocals]
      0
    • Wagstaff [Telebrella]
      0
    • Wagstaff [Thumper]
      1
    • Wigfrid [No Spear]
      3
    • Wigfrid [Spear]
      0
    • Wigfrid [Battle Spear]
      0
    • Wigfrid [Spear Gun Spear]
      0
    • Wigfrid [Spear Gun Battle Spear]
      3
    • Webber
      0

  5. 5. 5: Into the Multiverse

    • Walani [No Surfboard]
      0
    • Walani [Surfboard]
      1
    • Warly [Nothing]
      1
    • Warly [Crock Pot]
      0
    • Warly [Portable Crock pot]
      0
    • Warly In Real
      2
    • Wilbur
      1
    • Wilbur [Shadow]
      0
    • Woodlegs [No Legs]
      0
    • Woodlegs [Peg leg]
      1
    • Woodlegs [Look mom, all legs!]
      2
    • Wilba
      2
    • Wilba [no brim]
      2
    • Werewilba
      0
    • Werewilba [starving]
      2
    • Wormwood
      0
    • Wormwood [blooming]
      4
    • Wheeler [no pewmatic]
      1
    • Wheeler [pewmatic loaded with sticks]
      0
    • Wheeler [pewmatic loaded with nightmare fuel]
      0

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Primalflower

Primalflower

Posted
Posted

On a particularly boring day of winter, all of the Survivors were having a rather heated argument. Unsurprisingly, it was one of who could race the best again. 

"I'm the best because of my beard based survival tactics!", Chimed in Wilson. "friends say i race good" said wormwood, jubilantly. "I PERFECTED THE ACT OF RACING WHEN I WAS STILL A BLUEPRINT", uttered WX-78. Nobody was convincing anyone. The world sensed this, and sent a spirit to the camp to settle it all. Out from the firepit, a familiar figure rose, drawing the attention of all who could see. "Hey Stinkys!" the figure said, "You all-a need a couple-a lessons on racing! I'm-a the fastest racer west of dinosaur-a island!" He proceeded to summon 20 rather bare boned pipe frame karts, and motioned for his audience to all get on one. 

Once they were all situated, the figure snapped his fingers and suddenly time appeared to slow to a crawl for all but the survivors and their vehicles. Down from the heavens, the BFB's wretched head poked down. One after the other, her heads began to open, each revealing a slip of paper with a circle of color on it. Ready...Set...GO!

Instinctively, all survivors put the pedal to the medal and began one of their first races in a long while. After a couple laps, it was clear that they'd all gotten their much needed warm-up, and as such the spirit decided to up the stakes. He gathered them all to a peculiar looking "Launch-a Star" as he called it, which promptly sent them onto a colorful, rather frighteningly high-up track. Once they all got on, the same Big Friendly Bird lowered it's head, and gave them the same start. 

Who the heck falls first?

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Xanadu2003

Xanadu2003

Posted
Posted

Going off the canon lore already in the game it is quite obvious to anyone with an in depth understand of the worlds lore that wilson would fall off first. See wilson is someone extremely full of himself (this is confirmed by joe w) and he isnt actual a scientist. He just calls himself one. Its pretty interesting. So being this strange combo, wilson would immediately dash ahead and full into space because while he wants others to think he does, he does not at all know what hes doing.

 

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Auth

Auth

Posted
Posted

I was actually going to write down a structured argument for who would win, but alas, all the mario kart games play differently, and I would need to know what exactly which game's physics, items, and mechanics are being used, and if it's a more modern title like Mario Kart 8, I'd need to know what kind of kart they were using with what wheels/glider, and most importantly, I'd need to figure each survivor's weight.

For now, I'll just go with the original mario kart.

After doing Very Advanced Math(™)...

Standard Willow would probably win the race.

Wurt would be the first to be knocked off rainbow road.

Wait. She's not an option. Crap.

Wilba, then, I guess. Not going to factor in alternate forms for anybody as that seems like a waste of time, and I feel like giving Wigfrid a gun would cause her to just up and kill whoever's in first. While an interesting alternative to the blue shell, I don't feel like I should calculate the airspeed velocity of a battle spear fired from a speargun.

That and Woodleg's "All Legs" option makes me think that he has his 2 formerly missing (presumed dead) legs, and also has his peg legs glued onto his sides somewhere or something. Either way, not a pleasant thought and even less pleasant Very Advanced Math(™).

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Auth

Auth

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Lbphero said:

wurt can't drive, sorry!

But why?! She needs an equal opportunity, same as everyone else! Besides, not knowing how to drive can't be an excuse, because... erm...

Spoiler

maxresdefault.jpg

 

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