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Why I hate Splumonkeys


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Note that this is mostly a joke topic, and I don't hate Splumonkeys to death. I do think they are pretty annoying though....

 

So, of course I think we all believe that Splumonkeys are annoying. I find them extremely obnoxious and sometimes even deadly. These are some of the reasons I hate Splumonkeys:

 

  • So I was in a cave and it was winter, so I started freezing. I decided to make a fire but I needed 2 more logs so I decided to drop my lantern on the ground to chop down a tree. Long story short, a Splumonkey stole my lantern and it ended up with Charlie eating my face ;-;
  • I was exploring the ruins for the first time and I saw a slurper. I was wearing a miners hat and the slurper decided to hop onto my head and throw my miners hat on the ground. A Splumonkey stole it and was taunting me while wearing the hat. I tried to corner and kill the splumonkey, (since i didn't have any other available source of light). Then i kept getting bombarded by manure and went insane. I made it out of the cave by battling shadow creatures and using glow berries. On my world that monkey still has my miners hat.
  • Finding Shadow Splumonkeys for the first time, and having them chase you and repeatedly try to kill you until you leave the cave.
  • Stealing my Thulecite!
  • Eating all the bananas >:3

 

So, those are some of the reasons i dislike Splumonkeys. Also, one quick question: Is there anyway to break splumonkey pods and get the loot inside of them?

-Chaq

 

 

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Oh, gods, YES. On a related note, one of my very first experiences with Shipwrecked...almost made me stop playing it entirely.  It was like, frustrating, REAL-anger, hard, not _fun_-hard like the game usually is. 

I was playing as Wickerbottom.  I desperately needed one gold, just ONE gold, to make a science machine.  It was a few days in, and I was starting to starve from not being able to make actually-filling meals with a crockpot.

When the gold dropped, of course, one of those DAMN PRIMAPES, of COURSE, stole the CENSORED thing.

"If you kill the monkey that stole your thing, you can totally get it back!" I'd heard earlier.
What followed was...best described as a comedy of nightmares.  Imagine a constant barrage of monkey-poop, plummeting sanity and rain, backed by the Benny Hill theme played at a wrong, slOWed dOWWNNNnn.... broken record speed.

Kill the one that stole your stuff.  Right.  As soon as I can ever catch ANY of them, ever, I'll let you know how that goes.

In the end, I couldn't even _leave_, as the little monster stole the one last thing I desperately needed before I set sail--my one and only trap.  _With a crab IN it that I could have eaten_!  (Yes, I know they don't do that anymore NOW...)

Wickerbottom fell down in a morass of manure, shadow monsters, and pain. At the end, I'm not entirely sure what got her--health loss due to starvation, health loss due to constant monkey attacks, or being bitten in half by Crawling Horrors.

The absolute SECOND I unlock Wilbur, I am playing with primapes turned OFF in the worldgen (unless I am actually playing _as_ Wilbur) and never, ever, EVER having them in my world again.  Thank the volcano gods that's an option. 

Put it this way:  When I got done with this experience, I actually typed "don't starve shipwrecked (EFFING) MONKEYS!!!" into Google for the halibut...and found a Reddit thread about the game in which somebody else had used _that exact same phrase_.

: P

...Notorious

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On 6/23/2016 at 11:51 PM, CaptainChaotica said:

Oh, gods, YES. On a related note, one of my very first experiences with Shipwrecked...almost made me stop playing it entirely.  It was like, frustrating, REAL-anger, hard, not _fun_-hard like the game usually is. 

I was playing as Wickerbottom.  I desperately needed one gold, just ONE gold, to make a science machine.  It was a few days in, and I was starting to starve from not being able to make actually-filling meals with a crockpot.

When the gold dropped, of course, one of those DAMN PRIMAPES, of COURSE, stole the CENSORED thing.

"If you kill the monkey that stole your thing, you can totally get it back!" I'd heard earlier.
What followed was...best described as a comedy of nightmares.  Imagine a constant barrage of monkey-poop, plummeting sanity and rain, backed by the Benny Hill theme played at a wrong, slOWed dOWWNNNnn.... broken record speed.

Kill the one that stole your stuff.  Right.  As soon as I can ever catch ANY of them, ever, I'll let you know how that goes.

In the end, I couldn't even _leave_, as the little monster stole the one last thing I desperately needed before I set sail--my one and only trap.  _With a crab IN it that I could have eaten_!  (Yes, I know they don't do that anymore NOW...)

Wickerbottom fell down in a morass of manure, shadow monsters, and pain. At the end, I'm not entirely sure what got her--health loss due to starvation, health loss due to constant monkey attacks, or being bitten in half by Crawling Horrors.

The absolute SECOND I unlock Wilbur, I am playing with primapes turned OFF in the worldgen (unless I am actually playing _as_ Wilbur) and never, ever, EVER having them in my world again.  Thank the volcano gods that's an option. 

Put it this way:  When I got done with this experience, I actually typed "don't starve shipwrecked (EFFING) MONKEYS!!!" into Google for the halibut...and found a Reddit thread about the game in which somebody else had used _that exact same phrase_.

: P

...Notorious

That's why I use the "Monkey Hunter" mod when Primapes annoy the hell out of me. It's satisfying when you get to break into their tasty flesh when they can't do a thing about it. Only if it was out for DST =/

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